Fenfic
by Padbie
Summary: A series of short chapters detailing the unseen moments shared between Marian Hawke and Fenris.


_THERE ARE DRAGON AGE 2 SPOILERS IN THIS. Now that that's out of the way, please enjoy this little snippet that takes place between Fenris and Marian Hawke after a tragic and horrific event._

**All That Remains**

The room simply wasn't there. Hawke was sitting on her bed, but she couldn't feel it beneath her. There was a fire in the fireplace, but the crackling logs seemed to echo in her head. The air was heavy, thick. She felt like she was underwater. She saw only colors, shadows. She was numb, unable to even form a coherent thought about what she had witnessed just a couple hours before. She couldn't even force her mind to form the idea that her mother was gone. She was in shock, drowning in a blur of nothing.

"Hawke...I know that nothing I say would be sufficient...But... I am here." Fenris' voice made her blink and she was suddenly aware of the bed beneath her, the finely threaded elegant bed spread soft beneath her fingers. She noticed the fire and its warmth, the air in the room that was suddenly cleared of its murk. Hawke looked at him, standing near her bed, a sympathetic look in his expressive green eyes.

Hawke swallowed a lump in her throat. His presence had an immediate affect of comfort, filled a need she didn't know she even had. She laughed bitterly, still angry with the cruelness of the world around her. "Can you say something, anything?" She looked at the fire.

Fenris approached slowly and sat next to her on the bed a few inches away. Too far away, she thought. "They say that...death is a journey." He sighed, clearly frustrated with his inability to console her properly. "I'm sorry, Hawke," he said softly. "To be honest I've always thought these moments should not be filled with meaningless talk." She couldn't help but smile slightly as she blinked. She knew he wanted to comfort her, and he was trying, but everything was so difficult between them. It had been for a long time.

She stood. "I feel...numb," she said, moving toward the fire place, her back toward him. "I've been trying to cry, but I can't." She stood, shoulders slightly hunched forward, her arms hugging herself. She cursed her vulnerability. She felt him behind her. He moved close, and stood very still.

There was a soft pressure on her back, between her shoulder blades. His hand rested there motionless and warm, and then she felt the tears. She gasped, the noise of it piercing the quiet room with the beginning of her cartharsis. She shuddered as she began to cry, tears falling freely, the soft sound of her quiet sob the only sound in the room. Her guard down, hopelessly lost she turn and buried her face in the crook of Fenris' neck. She clung to him, her arms around his rib cage, shaking.

And then he was holding her. His arms encircled her shoulders firmly, shielding her from her pain. One hand rested on her head, his fingertips buried lightly in her short, blonde hair. She cried. And cried. And he was there. He said nothing and expected nothing from her. He just held her. And she let him.

When at last her tearful release was ending, she stayed there, relishing the pleasant smell of his skin. His scent transported her mind to the night they'd made love. He smelled the same. It was a slightly metallic mix of subtle sweat from both the summer heat and battle. She realized then how hard she was leaning into him. In response to her breath on his neck, he rested the side of his face against her head and held it there. The air changed and suddenly Hawke wanted nothing more than the physical comfort she knew she could have with him. She pulled back to look up at him. His eyes were soft as he touched her face, his fingertips sending a ripple of current across her skin. And then he rested his forehead against hers and they both closed their eyes.

Warm breath from his slightly parted lips caressed her face and she tilted her chin up to him, finding his mouth in the quiet moment. She pressed softly and held there, begging him to kiss her back. In her vulnerable state she simply didn't care. She was not ashamed. She needed him.

Her heart shuddered as he returned the kiss gently. It was motionless, but exactly what she needed. They held there for what seemed to be forever before Fenris actively parted his lips to fit perfectly with hers. She whimpered softly as his arms slid around her more tightly. Her head spun and the room fell away during the series of tender kisses. As quickly as it had started, Hawke snapped out of her comfort. She exhaled quietly as she broke contact with his mouth, the absence of it creating a lump in her stomach. She forced herself to pull away from him and turned toward the fireplace. She was suddenly very embarrassed.

"I'm sorry," she whispered.

"Hawke," Fenris said softly, respectfully maintaining the distance she had created between them.

"I'm ...I can't do this right now, Fenris." She took a deep breath. "Not now."

There was a long pause. "No," he said. "The fault is mine," He sighed, clearly frustrated with himself. "I... I'm sorry. I simply cannot bear to see you in such pain."

He was only making it worse. Hawke took another deep shaky breath, fully composing herself. "I… just... I need to be alone I think."

There was another long pause before he responded. "I understand," he said, his voice full of compassion. "You...should try to get some rest..."

She turned and smiled sadly at him. "I will. I promise. Thank you for being here, Fenris."

He nodded slowly. "Whatever you need." They looked at each other for a long moment before Fenris allowed a small, sympathetic smile to grace his lips. Then he turned and left.

The room was heavy again, a quiet tomb. Hawke lay down on her bed, fully clothed and pulled the heavy blanket up to her chin. She curled up in a ball and shut her eyes, hoping that tomorrow she would wake to find it all a bad dream.


End file.
